The Diverse Love Languages: Unseen Affection and Unyielding Protection
Love, one of the most profound emotions known to humans, comes in many different shapes, forms, and languages. It’s not just about romantic candlelit dinners, cuddles, or the occasional “I love you.” It’s a language that many of us speak but fewer understand, a symphony that plays out in a million different tunes.
Firstly, recognizing love when it is staring us in the face is not always straightforward. Love can be a shared laugh, a gentle touch, a patient listener, or a reliable friend. It can be found in the silence of companionship or the shared joys and sorrows of life. Unfortunately, our rigid societal definitions of love often prevent us from seeing these gestures for what they truly are – a testament of love.
Love’s Hidden Language
Sacrifice is an often overlooked aspect of love. It’s about giving up something valuable for someone else’s benefit, whether it’s time, personal desires, or dreams. The sacrifices made in the name of love testify to the strength and depth of this complex emotion.
Love as Mentorship
Mentorship is another profound form of love. It’s a selfless act of guiding another on their journey, providing wisdom, support, and encouragement. Mentors love through their investment in the personal growth and success of those they mentor, showing that love is as much about empowering others as it is about personal affection.
Trust and Discernment in Love
Love is also rooted in trust and discernment. Trusting our loved ones means allowing them to be who they truly are, not who we want them to be. Discernment, on the other hand, allows us to recognize and respect the boundaries, needs, and desires of others. It’s about understanding that love isn’t about changing someone, but accepting and cherishing them as they are.
The Many Faces of Love
Love has many faces, it’s dynamic and ever-evolving. It can be a parent’s nurturing care, a friend’s unwavering support, a partner’s understanding, or a mentor’s guidance. Recognizing the diversity of love helps us appreciate its presence in our lives in all its beautiful forms.
Love as Protection
Finally, one of the deepest expressions of love is protection – the constant, selfless desire to shield our loved ones from harm. This form of love often goes unnoticed, as it silently operates in the background. It’s found in the parents who work tirelessly to provide for their children, the friends who stand up for each other, and the partners who support each other through life’s storms.
Love, in its essence, is about caring for and protecting those important to us, through the highs and lows, against all odds. It’s about those who are always there, looking out and looking after you, time and time again.
In conclusion, it’s essential to value the unseen warriors of love, those who remain in the shadows, unyielding in their protective stance. They epitomize the strength, resilience, and depth of love, reminding us of its extraordinary power and immense value in our lives.
These things are stopping you from being Purposeful or Results Oriented
When it comes to health, financial, or emotional well-being, a song that comes to mind is “Zombie” by the Cranberries, but if I am really going there, “Zombies” by Fela Kuti. Have you ever heard either of these songs? While the two songs come from very different genres of music, both infectious rhythms are similar, and both can entrance us into the mindset of figuring out goals and if we are seeking a purpose or a result.
Take a moment to consider that it is the middle of July, and though seven months ago, many of us created resolutions for the new year, many of us gave up on them before the 28th day of January. Habits form in 28 days, and without a plan of action, the consistency or discipline to commit to a daily activity is supported by the bad habit of not following through. That “thing” you desire to have – the income, the car, the house, the time, the resources, that sense of personal fulfillment; do you plan for it to become more than just a dream? I wonder, how many of us have recurring dreams?
I am one of a few thousands of people that don’t dream often, but I do have an overactive imagination.
Please excuse this tirade or a tangent, but briefly, allow me if you will to preface the last statement because someone reading this is saying “Maybe you don’t remember your dreams but you are dreaming;” and respectfully, no I don’t dream often but I needed to say that to say this next part which that even if you don’t dream, we all envision and constantly daydream of the “good life.” You know the life where our healthiest hours in time are not traded for money gained away from the family we love, away from the homes we build, barely even driving the cars we indebt ourselves to all because we fail to plan or determine what purpose or results we are after as short or long term goals.
In figuring out whether we are seeking to fulfill or attain a personal sense of purpose brought on by some sense of duty, we can then say “Okay, this is a long-term objective.” We must also recognize that a desired outcome is the result of realistic achievable expectations. Reasonable expectations and outcomes for short-term goals can only be accomplished by daily efforts that accumulate over a short to long period of time that will produce higher income, greater benefits, improved health, and more wealth.
I don’t know about you but what is most important to me is more time to live life on my own terms – and so in conclusion, though it already goes without saying, move with a greater sense of urgency towards your long-term goals, but with greater vigor, a renewed sense of joy, and writing it down, or else without the plan for follow through and follow up action, it all stays like that Cranberries song, or Fela’s saxophone, the just play on repeat in your head.
Wellness Coach | DAOM | Financial Planner
#flo #holistic #mentalhealth
Parental Sacrifice and Entitlement in Children: A Closer Look at the Black Community
In today’s society, the subject of children seeming more entitled and less grateful for their parents’ sacrifices has become an escalating concern. Parents, across various backgrounds and demographics, strive to provide better futures for their children, a reality that is often more pronounced in the Black community. Regrettably, some children seem to take these sacrifices for granted, exhibiting attitudes of entitlement and ingratitude. This pattern has implications not just for the immediate family but for the community at large.
In the Black community, where parents often aim to offer their children opportunities they themselves never had, this concern is particularly poignant. Some researchers suggest that this may inadvertently foster entitlement, as children can come to expect a lifestyle they haven’t worked for and therefore do not value. It’s crucial to remember that this issue is not unique to the Black community but cuts across various cultures and socioeconomic classes.
The Psychology Behind Entitlement
Psychologists point towards several factors that contribute to the development of entitled behaviors in children. One key factor is ‘overindulgence,’ where children receive too much, too soon, and for too long. They grow up believing they deserve everything without working for it.
Professor Jean Twenge, in her book “Generation Me,” highlights the current generation’s higher self-esteem and self-focus, which can lead to entitlement. This could be due to societal emphasis on individualism and the “self-esteem movement,” where children are told they are special and deserve to have their needs met immediately.
Parenting Styles and Their Impact
The parenting style adopted can significantly influence a child’s development. Over-permissive parenting, for example, can unintentionally encourage a sense of entitlement in children. Parenting in a single-parent household can be challenging, with statistics showing that 66% of Black children are in single-parent households, compared to 24% of White children, as of the last census in 2020. This demographic reality can result in overindulgence due to guilt or overcompensation.
Steps to Address the Issue
Here are some strategies to address entitlement in children and to ensure parental sacrifices are not taken for granted:
1. Set Clear Expectations and Boundaries: Setting clear expectations helps children understand that privileges must be earned and not freely given.
2. Encourage Gratitude: Encouraging children to show appreciation for the things they receive can help develop an attitude of gratitude.
3. Practice Consequences: Allow children to face the consequences of their actions. This helps them understand that actions have repercussions.
4. Role Modeling: Parents should model the behavior they want to see in their children. If parents demonstrate appreciation and respect, children are likely to emulate these behaviors.
5. Seek Professional Help: If entitled behaviors persist, seeking professional help such as a child psychologist can be beneficial.
In conclusion, although some children may exhibit entitled behaviors, it’s important to remember that these attitudes are not inevitable. By understanding the factors contributing to entitlement and implementing thoughtful strategies, parents can guide their children towards healthier attitudes that honor the sacrifices made for their future.